This is why I love my stepmother

Marta forwarded this to me today and I thought I would share:

Dear Abby,

My husband is not happy with my mood swings. The other day, he bought me a mood ring so he would be able to monitor my moods. When I'm in a good mood it turns green. When I'm in a bad mood it leaves a big fucking red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time he'll buy me a diamond.

Sincerely,
Bitchy in Boston

My response: "This is why Dad doesn't buy you jewelry."