Beware The Google

Fugitive Caught When Date Googles Him.

Funny, I Heard He Was a Catcher
Cleveland Indians Pitcher Apologizes for Making Gay Porn Video. Don't worry, Kazuhito. It happens to the best of us!
(Via Drudge)

Just in case you'd forgotten
On the Delt investigation: A female freshman alleges 20 fraternity members interrupted a sexual encounter in the house and then stood around laughing and taking photographs.

Just to recap the 2000s in NU fraternity sanctions:

1/04 - Delta Tau Delta - suspended during investigation

6/03 - Kappa Sigma - chapter suspended, charter revoked

5/01 - Theta Chi - ordered to reorganize by national organization

5/01 - Delta Kappa Epsilon - NU disbands chapter

8/00 - Sigma Chi - charter revoked

I wonder if the editors actually read what they write...

From the front page of the Daily today

Officials examine incident at Delt
Chapter suspended during inquest; female freshman says lewd photos were taken
By Jerome C. Pandell

I can just see tomorrow's headline: "Daily reporter arrested for incident at Delt"

Article here.

Joel: hola bitchola
Ellen: hola senor tiny dick :-)
Joel: so you've been getting those e-mails about the size of my penis too?
Ellen: yes, although they refer to the size of my penis.
Ellen: i just assume they're talking about you.
Joel: a perfectly valid assumption

Question

Why is the guy in the flag shirt shaking a broom at the Governator?

Is it just me, or is Clay Aiken's Invisible creepy, obsessive, and voyeuristic?

Valentine's Idea

Give your special someone mono.

(indirectly stolen from Dave Barry's Blog)

This shit cracks me up
I feel secure knowing that my nation's delicate economy is in the hands of someone who can boil down years of Keynesian theory into a brutish demand for ribs.

Sweet

Wendy Chamberlain, eat this.

You Knew It Was Coming

You just didn't know it'd have such a postmodernly entertaining trailer.

File Under Greatest Hits
Woman dies after being struck in three separate hit-and-run collisions. And you thought you were having a bad day.

Wack The Penguin

Can you beat 274.3?

I Believe I Can Open My Fly
Why Michael Jackson Is Damned and R. Kelly Is the Man
How race, gender, and sexuality interesct in our judgment of famous (accused) pedophiles.

Lake County Moment I
Bumper sticker spotted on my way to the office this morning:

Guns Kill People
Like Spoons
Make Rosie O'Donnell Fat

When A Man Loves A Dick
Michael Bolton campaigns for Gephardt.

Conversation with an Idiot

Our IT guy is a boob, and I just had this interaction with him:

IT Guy: Joel, do you speak French?
Me: Yes.
IT Guy: (Coworker name) got this e-mail from someone with a Pasteur Institute e-mail address, and I'm poking around their website, but I have no idea what it says.
Me: *looks at screen* Did you try that link that says "English"?
IT Guy: Oh, thanks!

Freudian Slip
A colleague instant messaged me early this morning, right after I stumbled into office. I was frozen and uncaffeinated, but I realize that's no excuse.
Colleague: Are you free for a meeting at 9?
Me (attempting to launch Lotus Notes to check my calendar): One sex
Me: OOPS!
Me: One SEC!
Colleague: That's funny.
Colleague: Excuse me while I make a call to the ethics hotline.

I Haven't Been This Disoriented Since Dillo Day 2001
Apparently the terrorist threat level on this blog has been raised to orange. Has the comment feature gone the way of curbside check-in?

I'm a Giver

On Friday, we had our annual company meeting where we discuss how the company did in the previous year and goals for the next. They announced that they were starting employee awards, one of which is called the "Giving Back." Since I did the Avon Walk as part of a company team, I (along with the other two ladies that walked) was the first recipient of the award (and the lovely cash prize that accompanied it).

Thanks again to all of those who donated to the cause!

2004: Blog Personality Crisis Time
It struck me today that, in winter, the days are short, the days are dark, and there's not a whole lot going on in general. It's all quite sad in a turn of the century Brit Lit kind of way. OK, so I'm like lightyears behind everyone else in this realization. La dee da. But just because the days are bleek, doesn't mean Unfocus Group has to be! It's time to give this site a kick in the nuts. We'll be tinkering around with the design in the near term. Keep checking in, and keep posting!!

Roadtrip!

Who wants to go to Newfoundland?

courtesy Dave Barry

Somebody Stop These People!

Before redundancy strikes again, repeatedly!

Also, We Hear They Show Boobies
'The sense of the lesbian individual, isolated or coupled, scandalous, scrutinized, staggering under her representational burden, gives way to the vastly livelier potential of a lesbian ecology.'
-- Blurb-meister Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick, reviewing Showtime's new drama The L Word, in the Chronicle of Higher Education

Questions for your surgeon

Cardiac surgery makes English man gay!

Now Why Didn't Anyone Think Of This Before?

Woman tries to use "Get-Out-Of-Jail-Free" card from Monopoly on real judge.

The judge was apparently amused, but not amused enough to keep the woman from going back to jail.

New Year's, Southern Style
A couple of photos from atop Charleston.




Rooftop party at the Vendue Inn, Dec. 31, 2003.

How Appropriate
Blog of note: Ellen philosophizes and gossips

Best LOTR:ROTK Summary Yet

Here.

Fun For Geeks

The Internet Speedometer, to find out just how fast you can download that porn.

The Governator Was Just The Beginning

You know, if Ahnuld wasn't the governor of my state, I'd probably find this a lot sillier.

California's wacky, but Russia, on average, is a lot drunker. Who knows what'll happen...

Spotted on My Lawn

Inconsiderate people park at the edge of and on our lawn all the time (we're across the street from a Catholic church, if that tells you anything). So as we were pulling out of my driveway, Cleo spotted this pasted on the back bumper of a Buick Century: