Greece, in all its delightfully ancient and mountainous glory

Generic pedestrian = One snappy dresser
Originally uploaded by boldtype.

Since Jack outed my online Greece photos on that other blog, I finally got my butt in gear and cleaned up my photostream.

Greece works wonders on the booty

At a dive bar in Logan Square last night over tater tots and Delirium Tremens beer:

Not drunk female friend: "You know, your ass looks great in those jeans."
Me (a little puzzled but strangely intrigued): "Well, you can touch it if you play your cards right."

And, if you enjoy a good tot, one that is delightfully fried and crispy on the outside and hot and succulent in the middle, I suggest you get yourself to Quenchers on Fullerton and Western. For $3, you can have yourself about 1,000 of these little suckers. They're a little stingy on the ketchup, so be sure to ask for more. Don't order the tots with "The Works," because you'll end up with a lot of cheese (which is good), but also with about a gallon of sour cream (which is bad, depending on your feelings toward sour cream), which I made the mistake of accidentally flinging across the bar when I attempted to dispose of it.

That's right

This is the last random photo post, I swear.

*Seen in the Plaika area of Athens, March 14, 2006. 

Stupid Greeks, Stupid Drivers

So, Mark and I are driving back from Delphi to Nafplio in Greece last week. We've narrowly missed being squashed by other drivers, oh, a dozen times at least. Then some dudes in a pair of cars start daring each other to do ridiculous stunts at high speeds (120+ km/hr). Um. Yeah. Mark suggested after the fact that I should've flashed them. Alas.

Bad Metaphor Alert!

This Hollywood Reporter article about the television industry's contradictory reactions to the advent of YouTube contains perhaps the dumbest metaphor I've ever seen:

The media establishment's schizophrenic attitude toward YouTube reflects the undeniable promotional power of viral video, which sends clips bouncing around the Internet's young-adult user base like a beach ball at a Nickelback concert.

First of all, there's the patent absurdity of associating Nickelback with "young-adult users." I don't think that if there is anyone that considers themself a Nickelback fan, there's any chance that person is under 35.

Then there's the idea that anyone would bounce a beach ball to Nickelback.

I mean, this is a band so blatantly unoriginal that you can take their two hits and put one in the left speaker and one in the right, not even tweaking any speed or pitch settings, and realize they are the exact same fucking song.

Listen to that and tell me how anyone would bounce a beach ball to that shit.

Meanwhile at Roscoe's...

Random Guy 1: So are you gay or just haven't found the right woman?
Me: Uh... both?
RG1: Oh... My friend was interested in you.
Me: Guy or girl?
RG1: Girl.
Me: Oh, yeah, not so much.
RG1: Not so much, eh? *walks away*
Random Guy 2: That was the cheesiest pick up line ever.
Me: Thank you!

Oddly, this was not the first time I've been asked if I was gay at a gay bar/party.

PSA: I am quite inebriated while writing this, so I apologize for any incoherance.

Greetings from Greece

As seen near Emperieo, southern Santorini, Greece on March 17, 2006. 
Near the Tower of the Winds in Athens, Greece on March 14, 2006.  

Ok so admittedly I'm fucked up for finding this funny...

But can you blame me?.

I'd expect to read that on The Onion, not CNN.

That explains it

Well this explains how Brokeback Mountain lost for Best Picture (couresy Towleroad).

Also, the USA Today What You Didn't See At the Oscars.

Important News Update

My brother (the degenerate) is now certified to grow marijuana in the state of Oregon.

That is all.

I've got a "lesbian-wedding-in-Maryland-without-the-assistance-of-liquor" state of mind

Bride No. 1's College-Age Brother: "It's OK. If you catch one of the bouquets, I'll be your fall boy. I mean, we can have fun for 55 hours, like Britney Spears and that guy."
Me [making air quotes]: "55 hours of heaven. Whatever."
Bride's Brother: "I just expect blood on the sheets."

Best Family Circus Ever

Seriously

Somebody please post something. Anything. Anything besides the cupcake.